Wednesday, October 7, 2009

You - Part 6 - The End

We could have made it without sex. It was weird in a sense that we both (I presume, at least I was felling ok) were not drunk. Everything was not set. I could fell you, but I regret not having felt more of you.
I am not taking it wrong if you are with someone else, if you still think about someone else. I just want to have the opportunity to desire someone and show what I can do for this person and share it and I would like to be given the opportunity get the same,

When I tell you about being scared of you. I say, I have asked you few times to have a coffee with me, and you gave stupid excuses, and still, I tried again, and insisted, not regretting trying, but sometimes thinking… I might have been foolish, stupid, to keep trying, I might have not seen something that was too obvious, and maybe I still do not see.
You want that - maybe – to enjoy your life, have sex and that s it….

I know I can definitely control myself. I know I can understand.
I do not know what you think. I do not know what you fell. I do not know if you feel.
Just tell me.
I will not be begging. I do not need that.

The time I had you in my arms was so quick. I could not fell you properly. I could not realize. I could not touch you. I could not see you. I could not fell you intensively. I had you cuddling me. It was nice, even not lasting that much.

I am not afraid of expressing myself. I am still trying to have happiness and taking the risk.
I still can t believe how quick it was. Why do the moments that you have being waiting for such a long time just flies in seconds. To see you, to look to your face, to look into your eyes, to fell you inside me and look into your eyes. To touch you a hundred of times and know that you were there with me.

I am just really tired. People say I analyze too much… Yes, I do. I do not want to hurt myself again, but I believe good feelings can still exist……………
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I wish… I want … to shout, scream, yell,… whatever.

You know, you have lived with someone, must be intensive. I would like to understand this. It must be hard. To be attached to someone…
Anyway, I might become redundant, so I stop.

I have been asking myself why I am writing all these things….. To someone that I do not know really well, someone that I have no clue of what he thinks about me.

Maybe everything is just a stupid conception of my imagination.

1 comment:

Betania said...

I loved it.
It has soooo much to do with me...hahaha...